Wpoco (AOL)

Wpoco seems to love weddings - the infamous overlord of Weasel certainly seems to have enough of them. In fact, judging by the frequency, the only thing she likes better than getting married is getting divorced!

Early in the week, Wpoco and LtleShaver were joined in matrimony at Chez Diesel. Naturally, there was much alchohol involved, and rumor has it that Wpoco also married a pink fountain named Bob, although this report may be due to the booze-soaked circuits of the newsdroid dispatched to the event.

Of course Wpoco soon grew tired of LtleShaver (and besides, the fountain was getting jealous) so she dumped the duke. That same night, at a divorce party to celebrate her freedom from Shaver, Wpoco married the lead singer of FogHat, who were one of the bands playing at the party. The next day, she scored a hat trick by divorcing the singer, the king of Turkey and a Ferret, all in the same day.

Then the reports of Wpoco's whirlwind romance, marriage and inevetible divorce to DHyslop came in. DHslop described himself as 'the lowest-ranking person ever to be married and divorced by Wpoco'. At week's end it was discovered that Wpoco had divorced the pink fountain named Bob, dumping the water jet in favor of a transvestite borhter. Anyone who can provide information on what a borhter is should contact the nearest newsdroid immediately.

Imperial bureaucrats are looking into the curious fact that Wpoco seems to have been divorced more times than she has been married, but Wpoco casually explained this as resulting from an accident with a time-travel machine.