OhPeanuts (AOL)

Having realized the utter futility and hopelessness of life, OhPeanuts decided to make the ultimate expression of mortality. He chose to do away with himself on the planet Tikal.

Prior to performing his final act, OhPeanuts held a wake for himself. Sadly, all the people at the wake could seem to think about was the disposition of his estate. After being bombarded by questions of 'Can I have your money?' OhPeanuts decided it was time for him to take his leave.

In a ceremony rife with symbolism, OhPeanuts erected a crucifix. Upon completion he climbed upon the cross. All those assembled yelled 'no, don't do it' - well, all except for the delegation from the Kevorkian Eugenics and Euthanasia Foundation, that is. Then, in complete denial of the laws of physics, OhPeanuts nailed himself to the cross.

OhPeanuts lingered for quite some time until, after a stirring rendition of 'Always Look On the Bright Side of Life' he fell on Hellishkid and was crushed by the heavy crucifix. Hellishkid was unhurt, but totally disgusted.